Dear Vanilla Ice,
Call your lawyer.
A DJ named Lil’ Avalanche is spinning “Ice Ice Baby” during his set and I’m convinced it’s unauthorized. In fact, it’s his only record so it gets played often during his sets.
I’ve been around a long time. There’s no way “Ice Ice Baby” is in the public domain. And I can’t believe you’d approve this. No, wait. You had some naughty years. But still. A Frosty the Snowman DJ that retails for $29.95 in some stores? That’s a bit much, no?
I first spotted Lil’ Avalanche at my sister-in-law’s house. But he’s performing across North America. I just wanted you to know.
p.s. Remember to give anything you might get to the estates of Queen and David Bowie. Or you’ll be Under Pressure next Christmas.